Ok so, apologies about my last post. I was so sick and I barely remember writing it… Wow. What a grump! I can’t actually even remember when I did it precisely.
The first few days post chemo were hard. They told me I would more than likely feel bad for a week and that is exactly how long it was. I prayed I felt better by hubby’s birthday and sure enough, I woke up on his birthday feeling great and have since. The two most notable symptoms now are tiredness (I tire really easily) and my skin is really bad (Very itchy, red, dry etc)… My hair is still in tact but they said anytime from week 2 it will start to come out… So I assume by the end of the week I will be sporting a shaved head… I am not thrilled about it but certainly not as bothered as I once was. I think because now all I want to do is just get through the next 5.
On the plus side, one thing I am noticing is that the last few days I have not been sweating the small stuff. For those who know me well, know I sweat EVERYTHING. I am a stresser by nature. However, I have been so cruisy. My family are loving it. I think because in the grand scheme of things I realise that these things don’t matter. Yesterday, for example, a vase that I have which means a lot to me (Kelly gave me red roses in it when we were in Vegas) got smashed. Ordinarily I would be very distressed about such a thing. I didn’t worry about it. It is just a thing. I have a photo and these things happen.
Another thing was my darling husband requested that we stay in last night (Friday) instead of going out to dinner as we usually do on the weekend the kids are away. He has had a HUGE week at work plus with the chemo I have been sleeping a lot. Usually I am desperate to get out and about (Especially as I have been home all week) but I was more than happy to stay at home snuggled with him on the couch. He kept hugging me saying “I love being with you” and we watched MTV music channels, laughed and talked about music and memories. It was a fantastic night…
Our Night In
On this note I want to say that Thursday WAS my husband’s birthday With everything happening with our little man and then me, Kelly had requested that we forget his birthday this year and, in his words, “Celebrate in 17 weeks”. I was feeling down as I didn’t think I would, at that time, be well enough to do anything (And I always make a big deal out of his birthday because, well, I love him to pieces and he is the least demanding person I have ever met). I didn’t get him as great a gift as I usually would (Due to time and illness) and given how I felt, I thought I would have to give in.
Wednesday I woke up and felt moderately better. So I sat myself down on a wheelie chair and made him the cake of all cakes. Then on Thursday I woke up feeling AMAZING so I was able to make him buttermilk pancakes for breakfast, then take him lunch into work. Me being me of course took in a stack of ‘Happy Birthday’ helium balloons and the office invited me in to surprise him. His face was priceless.
Also at work he had to wear the work ‘birthday hat’ and work decorated his desk (I had e-mailed one of his colleagues the day before to alert her it was his day ). So cute!
When the kids got home from school we blew up balloons and put up a happy birthday sign then my gorgeous 8 year old girl cooked dinner for us all which was SO good! I actually have competition in the house! She did an amazing job!
The kids also decorated two sponge cakes for him and sang him happy birthday.
The night was topped off with ‘special cuddles’ and watching our favourite TV shows together.
Before Kelly switched out the light at bed time he turned to me, stroked my face and said “I love you snooks, thank you for giving me one of the best birthdays”. My response was “Well, aside from the gift” and he said to me “Babe, I have you and the kids. That’s all I want”
And therein lies ‘perspective’. He’s right. We have each other.
Oh and for those who are wondering what the gift was? Well, let’s just say that the largest part of it was something I think he really needed…